


Once More With Feeling

by Jougetsu



Category: David Blaize - E. F. Benson
Genre: Character Death Fix, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Magical Realism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-16 01:20:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13043550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jougetsu/pseuds/Jougetsu
Summary: Every once in a while a human comes into the world endowed with magic. What is not so well known that the same is true for many other creatures. Which is not entirely surprising to anyone who has known a particularly witchy cat or abnormally lucky raven. Yet magic persists even in animals outside the familiar scope of familiars. For example, it is not unheard of for insects to be magical.Such as the magnificent stag beetle.





	Once More With Feeling

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lilliburlero](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilliburlero/gifts).



> Dear Lilliburlero,
> 
> Here's a little something for your prompt about the Monarch of the Glen (and Missus!), I hope you don't mind I added a little magic into the mix! Have a wonderful Yuletide!

“My darling, I do believe we’re dying,” observed the Monarch of the Glen. 

“Yes, I know, dear,” replied his Queen-Consort. 

“I suppose we’d best get to granting our Blaize his wishes before we move on.” 

“Quite my way of thinking, dearest.” 

Every once in a while a human comes into the world endowed with magic. What is not so well known that the same is true for many other creatures. Which is not entirely surprising to anyone who has known a particularly witchy cat or abnormally lucky raven. Yet magic persists even in animals outside the familiar scope of familiars. For example, it is not unheard of for insects to be magical. 

Such as the magnificent stag beetle. 

While lacking the romance of the butterfly or the undisputed regal bearing of a queen bee, beetles were long understand by those wise magicians of Egypt to be divinely blessed. Thus this story concerns not one, but two beetles of the magical persuasion. 

Their powers are not entirely unlike those of djinni in fairy stories. They were born not of the smokeless fire of creation, but rather in the rich loamy earth as all sensible beetles are.

Their names are naturally unpronounceable by humans as they involve all manner of clicks and clacks and wriggles that require three pairs of limbs. For our tale we shall use the titles bestowed upon them by one David Blaize, the Monarch of the Glen and his Queen-Consort. 

Stag beetles, even those of the extraordinary variety, spend only a brief time in their full glory. Most of their years as spent as larvae and then for a glorious summer they are fully-fledged beetles before passing on their genes and perishing. In the span of a few short weeks the Monarch and Queen had become very attached to Blaize and wished to do him a good turn before they went dust-to-dust. 

“A streak of wondrously good luck,” the Monarch declared magnanimously after he had a good think. 

“Oh, that will never do!” tutted the Queen. “For after that ordinary luck will feel horribly unlucky and then he shall be miserable.” 

“Quite right, my darling,” agreed the Monarch. He waggled around the fresh leaves David had put in the wash-basin before bed. “Perhaps we can have a nice hamper conjured up? Filled with all the things his kind likes to eat.” 

The Queen considered this. “It is not a bad thought,” she allowed. “But is it grand enough?” 

“Have we decided if it shall be one big wish? Or a few smaller wishes?” the Monarch mused. “What will make the most impact?”

The pair of them paced around the wash-basin, partially for nice exercise and partially for stirring up their imaginations. “The chief problem is that we do not know when we shall expire,” said the Queen after some time and moonlight was now peeping through the dormitory curtains. “I am afraid if we try to do little wishes with breaks in between that some ill might befall us before we can finish granting wishes. Therefore one large wish is probably best so we can best observe its effects and rest well knowing we did something for our friend.” 

You may of course be wondering why they doted on David so. After all most creatures do not take very kindly to being taken in by humans unless they were injured or starving. However, magical creatures have a sentience that makes other sentient beings, like humans, very intriguing to them and they enjoy their company. So while the Monarch of the Glen and the Queen-Consort enjoyed climbing oaks and maples, they allowed themselves to be captured by David because they found the school and its inhabitants quite fascinating. 

Unlike other boys who go after insects, David was very charming. He never did anything like try to pull off legs or wings. He spoke to them constantly and tried to make their little box as palatial as possible with an assortment of fresh leaves and little twigs. At night they lived in his wash-basin (though many nights they went out for a nice little flight) also decorated with greenery for their comfort. Therefore it should come as no surprise that the royal couple came to be fond of him. 

The nature of what wish to grant dogged them for a few nights more. There was no end to the number of things David enjoyed, but nothing seemed quite special enough to be his fare-thee-well gift. A shiny coin, a chocolate cake, a spat of runs in cricket, none of it was enough. The latter especially would bring happiness to David, but they both knew deep down he would not be happy to have been magically assisted in his beloved sport. 

“He would take offense to it,” the Queen said shrewdly. “Our Blaize prides himself on his talents and merits.”

“Yes, but if we kept the weather extra nice then he could score a great many runs,” mused the Monarch. 

“Oh, but the other team could score just as many in such excellent conditions,” the Queen pointed out. Before the Monarch could jump in to say that the other team did not have Blaize on it the Queen continued with, “Besides weather magic is such a tricky thing. Best not to be attempted. That’s what those sorcerer robins told us last month." 

They had to content themselves with a handful of smaller wishes. So when David lamented he had left his text in the dorm it instantly appeared in his desk. And when he wished for a special pudding Saturday night the whole school was suddenly treated to dessert graciously donated by a former pupil turned patissier. The strawberry beds were suddenly twice as fruitful as usual and Carrots even more gracious than usual about offering David and friends their pick. For the record, the royals had nothing to do with Carrots’ mood. She was in natural high spirits and wanted to do a good turn for the boys who would be leaving next term. 

While a sudden summer storm couldn’t be put off David conveniently did not get his shoes wet or track any mud into the dorms, much to his surprise. But a nicer surprise was when he got an extra macaroon tucked into his bag when he went down to the shops. The beetles royal did not however grant the fervent desire for his favorite black socks to never need washing. It was very big magic to make something ever-clean and Blaize was growing by the day - those socks would likely not even make it to Michaelmas. 

One dark night, though not especially dark as the moon was swanning about waxing as she does, the Monarch and Missus-The-Monarch had fallen into quiet contemplation when some noise was heard. The creak of floorboards and the rustle of blankets is nothing unusual in a dormitory. However this night the creaking seemed to be coming directly towards Blaize’s cubicle. 

“Steady on, I’m sure it’s nothing,” the Monarch reassured his lovely spouse who was trembling a tad. 

“No, my dear, it is quite definitely headed our way,” the Queen-Consort insisted. 

“Pish and tosh!” said the Monarch. “Our Blaize has no enemies. Is he not beloved by all and sundry?” 

A figure slipped into David’s cubicle and in the half light they could see it was the boy known as Bags. His face was drawn into a quavering grimace as though his heart had been torn in two and his mind was unsure which side to take.

“See? It is only Bags!” chortled the Monarch. “He likes Blaize better than anyone else in Helmsworth.” 

“A spurned friend is worse than an enemy. And does he even like our David at all?” sighed the Queen as they were put into Bags’ soap tin. Which took longer than one would expect as Bags had to pluck up the nerve to touch the stag beetles in the first place. For unlike David he did not like insects of any kind, regardless of their magnificence. On the other hand Bags was not inclined to hurt them so that was in their favor. 

“I don’t like this box,” the Monarch grumbled as they were carried away from Blaize and hidden in Bags’ cubicle. “Not a single nice leaf or friendly twig. Why is Bags kidnapping us when he doesn’t appreciate our majesty?” 

“My understanding is that he is ‘on the outs’ with our Blaize,” said the Queen. She too did not care for the bare prison of the soap tin, but wanted to bear it up the best she could. “He’ll probably return us after garnering a reaction from him.” 

The Monarch shook his head, “How did I miss any of this?” 

“You had slept through most of the drama, my dear,” she replied. “It had gone on while Blaize was attending services.” 

“I don’t understand why they insist upon being diurnal creatures,” the Monarch scratched the sides of the tin in irritation. “I wouldn’t miss so much of the action if they were sensibly nocturnal like us.” 

One may of course be asking oneself why didn’t the Monarch and Queen simply not magic themselves out of the soap tin and back into the wash-basin. The question is not unreasonable. However, the couple decided it would only result in more bad feelings between Blaize and Bags. The Queen was so convinced they would be returned readily that she promised the Monarch that if Bags did not return them to David in two days she would magic them back herself with the last of her power reserves. 

That dire situation never came to pass as promptly the next day Bags hurried back to David’s cubicle and let out the royal couple onto his blankets. Though it was easier said than done. Touching them once in twenty-four hours had been enough for Bags so he had let the royals onto his sponge and then shook that gently above the bed until they fell upon the blankets.

“See?” the Queen said pointedly after they landed. It was a gentle landing as the drop hadn’t been large at all the the bedding very soft. “Bags is not such a bad boy. He was in a pique over our Blaize that’s all.” 

The Monarch nodded as gravely as a beetle could and then began scaling the little mountains and valleys that are the result of rumpled bedclothes. “I have decided what wish to grant, my darling.” 

“Oh, is it a very grand wish?” the Queen asked as she too enjoyed the dips and highs of the blankets. 

“No, it is a very small wish over a very long period of time,” said the Monarch. “Normally, I love grandeur you know that darling. But it occurs to me that we can’t do something grand. For Blaize is not a prince of his people and anything we do that is too grand will only give him grief.” 

“What is it that you are proposing, my dear?” the Queen asked gently. 

“That he continue to enjoy ordinary things,” said the Monarch. “The happy first bite of a treat, the thrill when a story moves you, the comfort of one’s friends. I have conferred with the garden cat, the dragonfly witch, and those sorcerous robins and they have told me that many times humans enjoy life when they are young and then become bored and unhappy with simple pleasures as they age. I do not like to think of our Blaize in perpetual ennui after we are laid to rest.” 

The Queen hummed happily, “That is the most sensible thing I ever heard, my dear.”

“It is sensible, isn’t it?” said the Monarch, puffed up with pride. “Which is why I’m surprised you did not think of it before me.” 

There came a familiar tread and lo, David had returned triumphant to his cubicle. “Oh Monarch and missus, you little devils.” 

His voice was suffused with such quantities of relief and affection that they loved David all the more for it. They were not mere curiosities to Blaize, but personages of importance. 

“Shall I grant it now, darling?” asked the Monarch. 

“Oh, yes, better to get on with it,” the Queen-Consort replied. 

A beautiful golden warmth spread through David’s chest which he assumed was simply from happiness at finding his lost little friends. It made the young man stop in his tracks for a moment before he went back to his friends. 

They did not get to see the resolution of the incident, but David whispered to them later that Bags had said he liked him awfully and now they were to be the best of friends from now on. “I am sorry you had to be kidnapped for that to happen,” he told them solemnly. “Isn’t it strange how sometimes good things happen after bad things or because of some bad things?” 

The halcyon days did not last forever, but the Monarch and Queen-Consort knew they couldn’t. Their golden summer would come to an end with or without their little friend. So it was bittersweet, but not altogether unexpected when Blaize came back from his trip to Marchester determined to part with them.

“I don’t like you a bit less than I did before, but I can’t take me with you. And it’s probably best I get into Marchester habits now before the term starts.” 

“It will be less sad for him when we pass on,” the Monarch reasoned. 

Which was approximately three hours later when Ferrers Minor promptly sat on their box. A little crushing they might have been fine with back in the spring, but as their natural days had been numbered there was little strength left in the royal stag beetles. 

“Oh, Ferrers! What have you done?” Blaize’s voice sounded both impossibly far away and very near all at the same time. “Oh Monarch and the missus! If only you could go on being yourselves and having adventures forever and ever!” 

The ghost of the Monarch of the Glen looked at the ghost of his lady wife. “Well darling, what say you? We’re only just vacated.” 

“It sounds like a wish to be granted,” laughed the Queen with pure delight and her soul burned with the last of her bright magic With a flash they were returned to their bodies haler and hardier than they’d ever been before because magic is like that. 

“Look they’re just fine!” Ferrers squeaked. But Ferrers was no Blaize to staunchly serve so the Monarch and Queen spread their wings to fly. 

David opened the window obligingly. “Farewell, Monarch and Missus!”

If Ferrers thought it awful mean for David to encourage them to leave it was of no consequence. 

“In the end we granted two biggish nice wishes for our Blaize,” the Queen Consort chirped happily as they took their leave. 

“And a good many smallish wishes,” the Monarch added. “Gracious we have had a busy summer! I think I’m ready for a little light adventure.” 

I cannot tell you for certain where the Monarch and the Queen-Consort went next or even where they went after that. A young Miss Rhoda Dixon in Yorkshire told her teacher she saw a fine pair of stag beetles seemingly dancing on Boxing Day, but no one believed her.


End file.
